Bug juice

Some of you are aware that I had a run-in with biting insects last Jan-Mar up in Savusavu.  There was speculation regarding what they were, with the likely culprit bedbugs.  

Somehow I expected this trip to be different.

It wasn't.  It isn't.

The bites hit two days after I landed on the boat.  They weren't too bad the first day.  They got progressively worse on my back.  About the fourth day - holy wah!  I was the Dave buffet for something.

Last night it was so bad that I made up my mind to get to a medical clinic for help.  Yeh, that's right, I voluntarily sought out medical advice.  That's how bad it was.

Woke up and went to the marina office.  "Can you recommend a clinic?"  "Yes, we always send people to Zen's Medical Clinic.  Would you like me to make you an appointment?"  Say howdy, ma'am.  Please do.

So I got a noon appointment at this medical clinic.  Same day.  Hell, same *morning*.  Try that in Hancock with Portage Health.  They would still be trying to figure out how to put my information in their stupid computer system...

Taxi to the clinic, arrive at ten to.  Seen right away.  Doc says, "How can I help you?"  I took my shirt off and turned around.  You could hear him gasp.  "Do you mind if I take pictures?  I've never seen a case this bad.  Do they itch?"  What do you think, Sparky?

Long story short, he couldn't tell what kind of bites they were - most probably bedbug or fleas.  He leaned strongly toward bedbugs though because he had just had an infestation in his house.  "I took this spray from the clinic here, sprayed every mattress and they went away within days."  Pray tell, what is this miraculous bug-annihilating spray of which you speak?

I wound up with prescriptions for the itching and a note on a piece of paper from someplace called 'Lautoka Farm Supplies and Hardware.'  "Go there, show them the note.  They will know."  OK.

Paid my bill.  $69 FJD.  That's about $35 USD.  Walked out the door, got lost, found the pharmacy eventually.  Got my prescriptions filled and set out for Lautoka Farm Supply.

Now Lautoka Farm Supply is about what you would imagine.  Old fashioned store tucked away amongst all the big shopping stores in downtown.  Floor to ceiling wooden bins with who knows what.  I showed the note to the kid who spoke to the manager.  Big smile.  "You have bugs?"  Yep, this is the place.  The kid goes in the back and comes out with this gallon-sized jug containing some foul-looking white concoction.  No label; no MSDS; no name.  Just the look of liquid death. "Twenty dollars."  Worth every penny (I hope).  I bought a spray bottle to use in spreading my chemical warfare.  I asked the kid "Do you sell a lot of this?"  He smiled and said "Very much.  Many people have bug problems."

Now this bug juice is used at a medical clinic and at a doctor's home so I'm going to go ahead and assume it won't kill me directly.  Currently I'm in the process of taking the cushions apart and spraying them on the deck - the stuff smells as bad as it looks.  People walking by downwind are wrinkling their noses and looking at me strangely.  Tough bananas, folks.  This is a bar fight between me and the bugs.  Only one of us walks away.  Will it work?  Stay tuned...